


Love only me

by Intheimpalababy (Stonathanstans)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, M/M, Manipulation, Pining, Snippets
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-09
Updated: 2017-11-19
Packaged: 2019-01-15 07:27:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,959
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12316515
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Stonathanstans/pseuds/Intheimpalababy
Summary: Re-upload:Sam Is away at Stanford and misses his brother





	1. Chapter 1

It's been almost three years since he left the only thing he's ever known. The only people he's ever known. His father, John, the man who made him into what he is today, or at least tried to make him into what he wanted.

The perfect solider.

Sam wasn't like that. He didn't want to do what his father did, he didn't want to be a hunter. Even if it wasn't said, the words and what John Winchester was feeling was evident on his face, hardened by years of trying to find the thing that killed his mother, killed John's wife. Leaving him to care for two boys. One who resisted in any way that he could and the other, the other. A perfect soldier, always listened to his father, Always did was expected of him. Never let anyone down. Not even Sam. Not even when Sam came to him three weeks before he was going to leave for Stanford.

Three weeks when he came to him, begging him, telling Dean how he really felt and what he wanted. How he wanted to feel Dean before it was too late, how, even when he did he begged Dean to come with him. They would find a place off campus, Dean could work somewhere nearby, they could be without their dad ever finding out. But no, Dean had declined. He had told Sam (His sammy) that he needed to stay with their father. He had to be obedient. He had to follow directions like the good little soldier that he was. He held his anger towards his brother for six months.

Six months of not texting, emailing, calling Dean. Of not hearing his voice. He didn't know who he was torturing with that. Because it wasn't Dean.

It couldn't have been Dean.

 

Dean wasn't the one who sat up every night, hands slinking down his body as he remembered every touch, every moan, every lick, every nick. It wasn't Dean who was sleeping with Jess, hoping that her body could replace the one that he had lost. Dean wasn't the one dealing with the pain and loss of him. Maybe he was, but if he had, he would have called or did something. Sam ended up calling him after a year, just to hear his voice. And he wished he would have called sooner. If he had, maybe he wouldn't have---maybe this wouldn't have happened. He wouldn't have heard a voice that wasn't Dean's nor was his father's on the end of the line. The voice was male. Soft, silky and seemed thoroughly fucked.

He wondered if Dean was lying near by.

Blissed out expression on his face as he slept. This guy picking up his phone, seeing his name and answering. Or was Dean in the shower? Washing away the scent and feel of the man in his bed and thinking of Sam? His Sam.

The only person he said he ever loved.

Sam never got the answer.

The moment that the man had answered he hung up.

Never calling Dean back.

Not for three years. He didn't have it in him.

He couldn't do it.

He couldn't sit on the line and wonder if that guy was with him as they spoke. If he was running his hands through Dean's hair like Sam used to do. If he was sucking his brother off while he chatted away with Sam and kept him up to date on what he was doing.

He wondered so much.

And would never know the answer.

 

"We graduate in a month." Jess' voice is low in his ear. She's wrapped in his arms, the moonlight hitting her bare body. Sam's mind was a million miles away. He's twenty-two now. Dean's birthday (his 26th one) had just passed and he called. Only to get his voice mail.

 

"Yeah."

 

"And you know that I've never felt this way about anyone in a long time."

 

He knows where this is going. She's been bringing up for the longest time.

 

"Maybe we should----"

 

He gets up. It's not something that he wants to do.

He wants to marry.

Just not her.

 

                                                       OoOoOoOo

 

" _This is Dean, If you have a situation, leave your name and number and I'll get back to you."_

"Dean, this is Sam, Sammy." He adds the last part. Knowing it will tug at him if he does. "I know things between us are---"

 

He has to lie. He needs to see Dean and the only way that he can, the only way that he knows that Dean won't blow him off for their father is if he says he has a problem that he can't handle on his own.

 

"There's a vampire nest here and I can't handle it alone."

 

There's a high chance that their dad will come along. He doesn't mind it. As long as he sees Dean.

 

He goes to hang up when it rings. Dean's name flashing across the screen. His heart stammers in his chest.

 

"Dean."

 

"Sammy."

 

It felt good to hear that again. To hear it on his lips.

 

"How long?"

 

How long? And then he remembers. Vampire nest. Right.

 

"I've been---I came across the first one before he could attack someone on campus. I'm not sure how many there are. This was about a month ago. "

 

"And you just called? Sammy that was dangerous.''

 

"I know. I thought I could handle it on my own."

 

"You know that you couldn't. No one could handle a nest on their own. I'll be up by tomorrow afternoon."

 

He doesn't want to ask. But he has to.

 

"Dad coming too?"

 

"Just me. He's uh, he went out on a hunt. I haven't heard from him in two weeks."

 

"Why didn't you tell me? Dean I could have--"

 

"Could have what? Have me call you and beg you to come and help me look for dad? As though you would have actually come."

 

"I would have."

 

For you. Dean. I would have.

 

                                                                     OoooOOOOooo

 

He doesn't know why he's anxious. Everyone notices but It's Brady that actually says something.

 

"Dude. What is your problem? You've been bouncier than a jack rabbit."

 

"My brother is coming in to town and I haven't seen him in three years."

 

Sam tries to hide the jitters. Tries to hide the a burning sensation was pooling in his stomach. Going straight to his cock. He would have to find a vampire's nest somewhere or lie about it. But he would have Dean in the same area. He would have him.

 

"We finally get to meet the elusive Dean Winchester." And Sam can see the lust in Brady's eyes. He's shown them pictures of Dean, Brady's been the one to show the most interest in him and he didn't think about it. Think about the two of them being in the same room.

 

"Yeah, but I don't know how much time you'll be able to spend with him. He's not staying long."

 

"Well I'm sure I can squeeze in time to see him."

 

Suddenly the anxiousness is replaced with something else. A certain fear that Sam has been trying to keep down. His brother falling and fucking Brady. That wasn't something that he needed. At all.

 

The roar of the impala is loud and clear as Sam waits for Dean at one of the coffee shops near campus. He showered twice. Making sure to be void of Jess. It was wrong, but when he hugged Dean he didn't want to smell like her. That always sent Dean into a frenzy. When he smelled someone else on Sam.

His Sammy, It made him seek out companionship.

He's dressed in loose fitting jeans and the plaid shirt that Dean loved on him, he also had gotten a hair cut. Jess noticed but didn't question.

 

He stands when Dean walks through the door. He looks the Sam as the day that Sam left. He doesn't know if he should hug him and that doens't become a matter when Dean pulls him in. Sam inhales his scent for a few moments.

 

"I missed you Sammy."

  
Dean pulls back and they both sit down.

 

"Me too. But you haven't been returning my calls."

 

"Been busy."

 

"Looking for dad?"

 

That's not the question he wants to ask. Dean shakes his head.

 

"With dad, this chick that I met and her brother. But I wasn't ignoring you."

 

"You still with them?" His voice is dry and Dean can sense the agitation in his voice. He places a hand on Sam's.

 

"I might fuck around Sammy but at the end of the day, no matter how far apart we are. You're the one I think about. Now about the vampire nest. When was the last time that you saw one of them?"

 

And he doesn't want to talk about this. He wants Dean. He needs Dean.

 

"Fuck me Dean." Sam whispers.

 

"What?"

 

"It's been three years. Dean I need you."

 

                                          =

 

Dean has Sam pressed against the wall of the hotel room he rented. The faux vampire's nest long forgotten the moment that Sam had given him that look. Both of their clothes are torn off, thrown across the floor as Dean drives into his brother.

Sam lets out a soft moan as his legs wrap around Dean's waist and pulls him closer.

 


	2. Motel

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This will be written in a series of snapshots.

When Sam wakes up the next morning he noticed that Dean isn't in bed. His heart begins beating quickly, his palms sweating. 

Was Dean really that upset that he lied? 

 

After giving Sam what he wanted, did his brother just up and leave without so much a goodbye? 

 

Sam slips out of bed. He looks out and  something soars in his heart, The impala is still there in the parking lot. 

 

The door opens seconds later and Dean comes through the door with a bag of food. 

Sam doesn't think, he acts and rushes toward his brother. He takes the bag out of Dean's hands and tosses it on the table. 

 

“What the hell Sammy?” 

 

“Fuck me Dean. Right here against the wall.  I need you, please.” 

 

Dean pushes him away. “We fucked like rabbits all night. I didn't get my sleep until three. We have some time.” 

 

Sam stills. “You're not leaving?” 

  
Dean smirks. “Not right now. I know you need me. I'll leave when you don't.” 


	3. Brady

Brady: 

 

Dean and Brady got along a better than Sam had expected.  

 

A week,  a week that Dean had been around and Sam was grateful for that, but he also hated the fact that both Jess and Brady had got a little suspicious about why he was spending so much time with his brother instead of hanging out with them and why he kept Dean a secret. 

 

And Brady knew why. 

 

The first night that they had met Sam couldn't even find Dean at the bar, at least not until Jess had pointed out the fact that Brady and Dean were In the back of the bar. 

 

His heart knew what his head was telling him and when he found them, he had his doubts confirmed. 

 

Brady was on his knees, in front of Dean. 

 

And Sam hasn't seen that amount of pleasure on his brother's Face in a long time. 

 

But he doesn't run away, no. Dean was his. 

 

He rushes forward, pulling Brady back and staring Dean directly in the eyes. 

 

“what the Fuck Sam?!” Brady yells and Sam doesn't even acknowledge him. 

 

“So cheating on  _ Samantha _ huh?” 

 

_ Samantha _

 

And Dean knows. 

 

“Sammy….” 

 

Sam grabs Dean's hand and leads him out the bar. They don't stop walking until they reach the impala. 

 

“Why Dean? Why Brady?” 

 

“I don't know.” 

 

“Do you even love me?” 

  
“You know I do.”

 

"Then prove it to me." 


End file.
